Energy Healing: Tip of the Iceberg?

Energy Healing: Tip of the Iceberg?

Jumpstarting Healing

If we were standard health practitioners, we would want to know four things:

  1. What are we treating?
  2. How should we treat it?
  3. How long will it take?
  4. How long will the heaing last?

As a deep healing practitioner, I start and stop with Step 2. I never get to Steps 1, 3, or 4. How can I help you? I ask the body. Then I do what the body tells me– with no preconceived notions about what we are working on, how long it will take, or how long it will last.

This is because the body and soul need only a jumpstart to heal. They will continue their work far after the client has left the treatment session.

The body and soul only need a jumpstart to heal. They will continue their work far after the client has left the treatment session.

What Are We Treating?

First, what are we treating? We are actually treating a vacuum, in that we are reviving the soul’s right to free choice and independent healing.

We are reviving the soul’s right to free choice and independent healing.

We are not treating the body but rather the body’s absence of support from its friends–and its results. This may be due to an unfriendly environment or something blocking the body’s ability to receive the healing already available.

If the body had had support from its friends, it would have already healed.

How Long Will It Take?

Second, how long will it take?

Some things are already known. A standard Craniosacral Therapy treatment can continue for two days after the client leaves. Example:

“Even after you finished, I felt toxins pouring out of my body.”

But how long after those two days will healing continue to unfold? And what levels of healing will have been reached when the healing runs its course?

Most healing is immediate and felt on the massage table or shortly afterward in its physical, emotional, or spiritual form. However, sometimes a deep healing gradually evolves from a physical release to an emotional or spiritual one and is appreciated only months later:

“In the past four months, I have reached a positive spiritual and emotional state that I have never been in before–such a blessing during my husband’s deployment [overseas]. It’s helped me get through it with strength and happiness. I attribute a lot of this switch in me to the experience I had with Craniosacral. I didn’t realize until recently how much of a transformation had actually occurred. Is this really a possible outcome of opening up energy pathways in my body? I can’t figure out any other reason. I really feel that Hashem [God] sent you as a little shaliach [messenger] to bring me to a place that I was meant to be in during this stage in my life. Thank you!”     Mother of Three Young Children

How Long Will the Healing Last?

Sometimes healing is permanent. One client’s ADD did not return after her single Craniosacral Energy Healing session, and another client’s osteoporosis disappeared permanently after one Guided Healing session.

However, sometimes healing remains incomplete to remind us that the basic healing hasn’t been completed.

I had a client who couldn’t raise his arm in front of him. One session of Craniosacral Energy Healing fixed the arm and he was able to sleep. But only for 3 days. This is because he did not fix the attitude that his body was trying to call his attention to in the first place, to whit–he needed to be planning to teach courses in England.  A second client had decades-long back pain that disappeared after a single session of Craniosacral Energy Healing. It returned later in order to have its source eradicated by a single Family Constellation. Since the Constellation, she has had no more back pain.

Like Craniosacral Energy Healing, Family Constellations create ongoing healing in ever-deepening realms. A Family Constellation needs 6 weeks to solidify its healing from the heart out. You don’t talk about the meanings in your Family Constellation for 40 days. (40 days is one and a half moon cycles, according to Teacher Vlado Ilic.)  In talking and intellectualizing about–mentally analyzing–your Constellation’s meaning, you will dissipate the energy of the heart’s healing as you bring it into the heartless realm of mind and words. The heart has seen a new and more truthful reality, and it, as well as other phases of your life and soul, needs these 40 days to strengthen and to adjust.

Likewise, we don’t do any homeopathy or any other treatment of the issue dealt with in the Constellation for 40 days, since these remedies might change the course of the healing that you began with the Family Constellation.



Do Our Ancestors Still Love Us?

Do Our Ancestors Still Love Us?

Have you ever really thought about your ancestors? Grandparents–yes, but how about their grandparents, and their grandparents, back through the generations?

They are waiting for us–to do good in the world, to correct their misdeeds, to bring holiness and salvation to our entire family structure. In Family Constellations, we meet these souls and bring love and flowing gratitude naturally into our systems.

But did you know you can see or contact these ancestors in a Craniosacral Energy Healing or Guided Healing session? Here’s how it works:

You remember from Do Angels Heal? that angels often show up in the Craniosacral treatment room in order to help their loved one or witness their healing. These angels, as we saw, may be ancestors.

“Miriam” and “Yocheved”

Sometimes they come to deliver messages that they are embarrassed to say in person. Example: “Yocheved,” a student in one of my Craniosacral Energy Healing workshops, practiced on her partner “Miriam.” Now Miriam and her husband had been among the first Jews let out of Russia. When they arrived in Israel, they did not know if they would ever see their birth families again. However, perestroika happened and all their immediate family members were eventually reunited in Israel.

Yocheved did not know this story. Yet during the practice, Yocheved began to smile softly. Later she told Miriam: Your parents were in the room. I saw their hair but couldn’t see their faces. But I knew who they were. They want you to know how proud they are of you that you brought them and your entire family to Israel!

Feeling this appreciation was apparently very important to MIriam’s healing, but for whatever reason the message would not have been either delivered or accepted in real life. Miriam’s parents’ souls chose to have an emissary deliver the message during a Craniosacral healing session.

Who Visits?

Ancestors as well as significant others often show up during Guided Healing sessions (in person, by phone, or google-chat/hangouts). We described in Energy Healing: Is It Kosher? a recently deceased beloved grandmother, “Granny,” whose neshama (soul) would hover around the ceiling and give answers to long-sought questions that troubled my client. Normally it is the deceased mother’s mother’s neshama who comes to help but it can be any significant other, dead or alive. Frequent visitors to female clients are neshamot (souls) of mother or siblings; old boyfriends, still living; or deceased fathers–all asking forgiveness or volunteering love and appreciation that they failed to convey in real life.


The volunteerism is often astounding. We learn in Chana Luk’s Ohr HaEmuna healing to invite a troubling neshama in the room in order to fix some wrong between that neshama and the client. But here, in Guided Healing sessions, we deal only with neshamot who have already entered the room to help us, or who step forward from a group to help us when we ask for a volunteer. Sometimes so many neshamot are standing in line ready to help that their messages fill a one or two-hour session!

Neshamot & Their Personalities

Another astounding piece is how the neshamot communicate to us in their pre-death fashion.  The neshama of an impatient or suspicious person may communicate with us abruptly or in a withholding way until they trust us.

Yet their true love and concern, even of a suspicious person, will often come through in the end.  One such suspicious neshama was always present but rarely forthcoming without our initiating a lot of questions. Such encounters felt slow and unjoyous. Suddenly, one day, when we had not turned to her for a long time, we asked a question and she replied, in her still less-than-welcoming but nevertheless now-interested manner, “I was waiting for you to ask that!”  Of course she could have volunteered the information like a “normal” neshama, but that was not her way!

Channeling through One Individual for the Good of All

Which highlights how much the neshamot are waiting to help us and enthusiastically welcome our participation. In many families, my client is the only one who is willing to listen and so the ancestors must do all of the family’s helping and problem-resolution through that one individual.

Getting Stuck

Sometimes we have a question and no one is there to help or answer. We ask if we should proceed and, if yes, we ask, Is anyone available to answer this question?

Gradually we will see a scene of 3 or 4 rows of participants like in the old game shows on TV. Usually we will see a volunteer’s hand raised in the back row. Although it is not entirely necessary to know, we try to identify the neshama. Then we ask the question and proceed as normal.

Healing before Mashiach

What is the result of all this communication with neshamot? The first thing you notice is a feeling of peace, well-being, and liveliness in the client’s face. They know without a shadow of doubt with whom they have been in contact and know they have help from Shamayim (Heavens). Their slights and insults and neglect and other wrongs they have received in this lifetime have been forgiven through the visits of penitent and caring souls–and the true underlying love and endearment have been expressed in ways meaningful to the client. Their life has been set right.

So some neshamot come to seek forgiveness or to express love or to set things right. Others come to advise us of our current path (see Measuring Healing) or decision-making forks in the road. Still others, like “Granny,” offer repositories of past knowledge.  All these activities, and more, are necessary in these days preceding the Mashiach for us to heal, and heal well, with love and gratitude.

We have the power to change our family’s past and future. The ancestors’ hands are tied, so to speak, as they are no longer living in this world. All they can do is guide and advise. This they are more than willing to do–if only they can find among us living–someone who is willing to listen.



Energy Healing: Is It Kosher?

Energy Healing: Is It Kosher?

You may be asked whether the healing you do is kosher. Here are questions that I have asked rebbeim (rabbis) that may help:

Asking Questions of Neshamas Who Have Passed Away

Q: May we contact and ask questions of the dead?

Background: A young woman had come to me for sinus issues. She had been particularly connected to a grandmother who had recently passed. As we progressed in our Guided Healing session, I noticed someone who appeared to be the client’s mother’s mother hovering around the ceiling in the northwest corner of the room. She appeared to want to help, so I asked Granny questions directly and relayed her responses. I was getting remarkable answers when the young lady suddenly said, “We need to be careful about ‘contacting the dead.'”

It was clear that Granny wanted–I would say, was anxious–to tell us things but she didn’t volunteer them. We had to address her and ask her each question. It was our initiating the various parts of this back-and-forth conversation with Granny (who was already present in the room) that bothered the young lady as a halachic question.

A: Rabbi Daniel Kohn, Rav of Bat Ayin

Rav Daniel said it was fine–that the Lubavitcher rebbe used to go to his father’s grave to ask questions. If our asking her questions was how Granny wanted to communicate with us, it was entirely fine to do it her way.

The issur (prohibition) about “contacting the dead” is specifically about the yedoni–which involves rattling certain bones to raise the dead.

Are Family Constellations Kosher?

Q: Are Family Constellations kosher? After all, it seems like contacting the dead.

A: Rabbi Daniel Kohn, Rav of Bat Ayin

Yes, it is fine. [Rav Daniel explained that he has personally experienced a Family Constellation-like mode in which you act as a representative for someone else, and when you are done, you just return to your normal self.]

Q: But maybe it is avoda zara?

A: How can it be avoda zara? You are not bowing down to anything.


Jewish Family Constellations: Kol Yisrael Areivim Zeh l’Zeh

Jewish Family Constellations: Kol Yisrael Areivim Zeh l’Zeh

In the non-Jewish world, Family Constellations are beautifully linear. You stand in an orderly lineup of one generation behind the another. You don’t speak unless told what to say. You wait for the facilitator to tell you what to do next. And if the facilitator says you feel something and you disagree, you do NOT argue. Very Yekkishe (Yiddish for German-orderliness)–everyone in his “platz” (place).

This is as it should be, as Bert Hellinger and my other Family Constellations teachers have largely been German. Even when Hellinger facilitates Family Constellations in Israel for Holocaust survivors (Rachel Weeping for her Children), everyone seems to obediently follow the script.

Linear vs Exploded View

Trouble is, when a Jew facilitates Family Constellations for Jews, the fake orderliness blows apart. And no one prepares you….

Trouble is, when a Jew facilitates Family Constellations for Jews, the fake orderliness blows apart. And no one prepares you….

Take my first time student-facilitating a Family Constellation for “Leah”–my class’s only other Jew. Here’s Leah’s Father– stooped and crumpled on the floor, loosely surrounded by a mess of family members. Across the room, Leah’s Mother and all her line are livid about something and strewn about in a disheveled mass. Leah’s screaming that I should not work on the mother’s side of the family, but the father’s side. There’s no calm anywhere and no obvious direction to turn. I look up helplessly at my teacher.

“I don’t know where to go with this,” I admit.

“Sit down,” she replies. It was the only merciful thing to do. She takes over and later invites me to sit by her in front of the class.  “Any questions?” she asks me.

“Yes,” I said. Everyone in my Seattle Family Constellations class knew I was going back to Israel, so I was frank. “For those of us who are going to do a lot of Jewish Family Constellations, are they different from normal–I mean non-Jewish–Constellations?”

“Yes,” she said. “Every Family Constellation I have facilitated for “Leah” has taken 2 1/2 hours [a “normal” Family Constellation takes half that time]. In an Irish Family Constellation,” she continued, “The father would just leave. In the Jewish Family Constellations, they don’t leave each other. They just get entangled.”

In the Jewish Family Constellations, they don’t leave each other. They just get entangled.

Kol Yisrael Areivim

That was the key. That’s why things are SO complicated in Jewish Family Constellations. Kol Yisrael areivim zeh l’zeh. Each Jew is responsible for each other.

Now you may argue that you know of a Jewish family in which the father left the family. But Family Constellations show an entirely different picture of a Jewish family’s norm.

Connecting Independently to the Spiritual World

Family Constellations highlight another difference between Jews and the “normal” world: we connect independently to the spiritual world. (I include, as Jews, conversion students who are not yet Jewish.) You see, in my Seattle class, we were taught to stand close to the rep who needs to say something, and we will feel what needs to be said.  We then tell the representative what to say.

When I tell this to my Jewish Family Constellation participants here in Israel, they get indignant. Here are excerpts from a letter I wrote to my teacher, in which I am curious how Jewish Family Constellations differ from “normal” constellations and what this tells us about ourselves as Jews:

Wind-Up Toy

First, I hardly have to do any facilitating. I don’t even open with a warm-up exercise to open their hearts, like your ringing your crystal bowl.  I just say something like, “Let’s see what’s in X’s heart. X, how do you feel now? and How would you like to feel by the end of this constellation?” and let things roll. Everybody in the Family Constellation automatically knows exactly what to do–even if it is their first time seeing a Constellation. They know what to speak–and, amazingly, they come up with the same statements that we have learned from you–on their own! If I suggest a statement that doesn’t resonate with their situation, they will express their disagreement LOUD and CLEAR. And then they come up with a deadly accurate statement that I could never have come up with. When I tell them I was taught that the facilitator had to come up with the “statements,” they look at me like I’m crazy and ask loudly, “Why?!” They already know exactly what to say and don’t want someone interfering with their abilities to reveal the truth.
All I have to do is set up the constellation like some wind-up toy and sit back and watch. Of course sometimes I add people or suggest a break-through somewhere. But when I do, I tell people why I am doing it as if we are all learning general principles (which we are).
And so my facilitating Jewish constellations is a little more relaxed than facilitating in Learning Circle.  Even when, like a few weeks ago, I had to facilitate a constellation not only in Hebrew/English but also French! Things just seem to take their course to a very powerful, moving, and loving place.

Relating to Grandparents & Great-Grandparents

A second difference is the Jewish Client’s strong connection to relatives further back. I recently facilitated a Family Constellation for the Whole Health Forum outside Jerusalem. We did a beautifully linear constellation. Each representative going back 4 generations, plus the Homeland, had all made peace with each other in turn, including the Client’s representative.  All looked well when I invited the Client to take her place in the Constellation. We had 10 minutes left. I was starting to feel relaxed because the conference had only given me an hour and 15 minutes to work and, as you know, this is half the time we really need, and it really looked like we were going to make the deadline!
Suddenly the Client became hostile. She would not even LOOK at her Mom’s rep, with whom her rep had already made peace. Something went unexpectedly wrong. But what?
I thought quickly–something is out of alignment. “Do you have anything to tell your grandmother?” I asked the Client. Boy, did she! She could not deal with her Mom until she had stepped back a generation and given her grandmother a piece of her mind!  We even had to let her communicate with her great-grandmother for a moment. Fortunately, things were worked out and, with about 3 minutes left in the session, the Client completed a beautiful constellation with her Mom’s rep.

Cousins Three-Times Removed

A third difference is how far from the direct family line we Jews are emotionally connected. Last week I facilitated my own constellation. The Family Constellation showed that I was influenced by relatives in a “side” line whom I never knew about: my great-grandmother’s siblings who had apparently lost children in the Holocaust. Not only was I unaware that my great-grandmother had siblings, but I didn’t know we had lost relatives in the Holocaust. The word Holocaust was never mentioned in my home growing up and as far as I knew, we were an intact family: both my mother’s parents were US-born; both my father’s parents grew up in the US; and all their siblings were in the US. I had never suspected anything among my great-grandparents’ forgotten siblings.
When you debriefed my facilitating X’s constellation last fall, I began to understand how all Jews are responsible for each other. I am only now, through facilitating constellations here in Israel, able to see some of the extent of this responsibility.
What happens when a Family Constellation turns “entangled” into “loving and responsive”? Just a few minutes after our post-constellation ice cream party, I became aware of people standing behind me for the first time. Not just anyone, but a large and continuously supportive family. This took me by surprise because I had done 6 constellations already and although I have felt more grateful after the first constellation, the others had not affected me in any positive way.  Maybe they brought up more anger and feelings of being misunderstood–but that’s about all.
Now before last week’s constellation, whenever I would think of my family, I would want to grab an emotional crash helmet. In my family of birth, I never knew when I was going to be attacked for being who I am. I never knew when most of my family would make up some narrative about me instead of seeing the precious gold I was mining in this lifetime of connection. Once I felt the strength and power of the amazing family and ancestors that now back me, I realized how marginalized my family had always seemed to me. Sort of like a washed out sidewalk-chalk-portrait after a rain….and it was all I could do to try to get them to help me sometimes, only to watch their backs as they ran away from anything I needed them for. Now, power, power, power is all I feel from them!
I am curious about who these perished people were. Yes, we had dealt with some of those who perished in the pogroms in a constellation with you this past fall–but there were more people who had experienced pogroms and of course the Holocaust who made their presence known last week. I am willing to love them also and call them my own–now that I know they exist somewhere. I don’t feel lost looking for someone I don’t know anymore!
What is open now is more willingness to heal in any direction possible.  I hope to delve deeper into what it means to be a healed person and, more importantly for the Jewish people, what it means to be a healed Jew.







What Is Energy Healing?

What Is Energy Healing?

In Energy Healing, we tune into the energy of the body or situation and wait for directions. With humility, a light touch, a pure desire to help, and a lot of practice–the gifted therapist will know how to help the body self-correct, the mind reach truth, the soul fly.  When people come to me, their body and soul have been making a laundry list of whatever they want to work on: in priority order. We will not know how the body, mind, and soul want to heal. Sometimes a craniosacral session turns into guided healing and ends with an individual family constellation. Or the opposite! Body, mind, and soul will always interrupt the session (I call it “high-jacking”) to get done what they came for!

Some clients will find that their shoulder suddenly feels better. Others will get answers to whatever they need to focus on. Often the healing is on a more foundational level than the client thought to deal with–and the results more far-reaching….

It is hard to speak of deep healing without talking about God! If I help heal people’s conflicts and misconceptions in ways that speak to them, make sense to them, comfort them, and strengthen their unique capabilities and journeys–then it is natural that, once the body and emotions are soothed, clients find they can connect better to themselves and their Divinity.

Guided by the unseen world, we can navigate–even benefit from–life’s ups and downs.